bullying.

[The Tomato]

True enough, I were bullied as a kid. "Just ignoring them" for several years did not work out that well. Breaking one of the bullies nose against a brick wall worked just fine though :/

As for zangief kid:

[Hyper Kinetic]

Fighting back is not often a viable alternative either.
The problem with fighting back (and losing) is that they keep coming, and harder, because they now know that they can get a reaction out of you.
Or at least that was my experience.

Anyone got any interesting experiences to share?
I was one who copped quite a lot of bullying. It was easy, looking back at it. I was a powderkeg (in terms of "It was easy to annoy me to the point of reaction"). I was also one of the smallest and the weediest kids in my year. Combine the two, generic kid group mentality and the previously mentioned probable fact that everywhere has bullies, and it is not hard to see why I was The Chosen One.
My worst one was when I was wrapped up in fence wire and prodded with sticks before teacher intervention.
Scarred for life? Me? Nah... surely not...

[Tyrantor]

Meh, I think I wasn't bullied simply because I tend to have a presence on me, if you know what I mean. If someone gets up in my face I'll call them on it to the point of their humiliation - which is always funny as (please do not swear). If they start getting physical, let them, violence is never an answer but if you can hit the guy so hard he doesn't ask the question then I'm all for that. In defense, of course.

I've stuck up for a couple of people if they have been being bullied simply because I don't see the point in it. It's funny though, I'm quite small - about 5ft 7" and not exactly a violent guy - so it makes for fun times when they never see the inevitable headbutt coming. Been jumped a few times though, tends to happen alot over here. Like, a very lot. Generally when that happens you just hope you are quick enough to get away or hard enough to make them regret it. And, unless you're packing an axe with that can of Cola you're carrying, it tends to be speed that wins the day.

The problem with fighting back (and losing) is that they keep coming, and harder, because they now know that they can get a reaction out of you.
Or at least that was my experience.

Make a God bleed and watch him lose his control. Same thing I'd imagine. If someone bullies you and you can wound them fatally enough (metaphorically) then they will back off - they won't want to end up looking like a normal person again.

Life's always going to have its douches, I guess.

[Tyamius, Shadow Lord]

I was, hell I still am a powder keg. People will talk smack and I will laugh at them until they get mad and start swinging. I attempt to ignore the smack talk till it they are in my face with it though. I had a guy get in my face and yell at me, I laughed at him like he was joking, he broke my nose. I still laughed at him straight to his face when I started hitting back.

[zephoid]

The reason bullies get away with it in school is often because of the lessons the children were taught. When you teach a child to "ignore them" they will do so. Even/especially when the bullies pick on others. If people support each other the bullies will back off almost every time. They like to think they are tough, but when they are outnumbered they wont fight.

I was picked on as a kid by the school bully and his friends. My best friend in elementry/middle school was a real bookworm tho and would not stand up for himself ever. I could stand being picked on myself, but when he picked on my friend in front of me and a few of my other friends I punched a tooth out of him. His friends didnt dare do anything once they realized we werent going to put up with that (please do not swear) anymore. They never picked on us again through the rest of middle school. Damn proud of myself.

Never teach a kid to ignore bullies. They want that kind of behavior. The will pick on you for years like that and thats when people start getting mentally messed up. Don't teach them to fight back either, because thats just going to lead to problems. Teach them that teamwork is how you get stuff done and let them go.

Too much codling and safety nets for children these days. If they want to do something silly/ a little bit dangerous, let them. Be there if they get hurt, but dont make a big deal out of it. I was a Boy Scout for 8 years in a troop that never had a good central leader and the parents didn't want to bother controlling us. We grew up in the troop making our own rules and making some stupid mistakes, but we came out of it with a lot more experience and confidence than if someone told us "don't do that". Preparedness and real confidence isn't something that you can teach from a book. Make mistakes, and do stupid things, but in the end you will learn WHY you shouldn't do those things and know how to react if something bad does happen. That's why im proud to be an Eagle Scout. If something bad does happen, even if i cant fix it, im not going to be hysterical.

How does that have to do with bullying? Self-confidence. Bullies are going to pick on those who dont have self confidence. If there is one thing you can do for a child its to let them try things to gain their own self confidence. Most important thing you can have in life. Self confidence leads to good social skills and that leads to good jobs. I had no self confidence in elementary school, but Boy Scouts changed my life. Make mistakes, be a bit crazy, try new things, trust me, it helps.

[commandersasha]

Another ex-Scout here, now a Scout Leader, plus a Dad of a 12 yr old son who just dealt with his first school bully perfectly: My son waited until the first blow by the bully, blocked with Taekwondo moves until the bully gave up, then spoke to the teacher.

Bullying is just a power game, a test of self-confidence, and a vital life lesson. I was unlucky at school; I didn't get bullied. It took years for me to get the hang of standing up for myself at work, in relationships etc. as a result.

Life will bully you. As an adult, you will have mean co-workers, draconian taxmen, petty officials, and overdemanding friends.
Learning as a kid how to draw the line between ribaldry and insult, give-and-take and unfairness, and reaction and over-reaction, is important.

Turn to friends, parents, teachers for support, but at the end of the day...deal with it.

Oh, and slap HFPandora for practice!

(You know why that is funny? Because HFP can obviously take a joke, and bounce back for more. If he had fled the hive, it wouldn't have been funny. HFP rocks. Slap him again).

[Deathnid]

i have been (and still am a bit) bullied at school, and the just ignore it option doesnt work AT ALL. i tryed fighting one once but the teacher broke it up before i could realy lay into him it was more one of those push- fights. they dont like to get close, they prefer intimidating moves like pegging footballs and stuff.
they pick on you becaus they are bigger and they start out tormenting you. if you try to make a witty comeback they will just start swearing thier head off at you and if you keep going youl get yourself bashed. in most cases you could mop the floor with the bullie, but they hang out in groups.
the best way to combat this manouver is to try and make friends with the semi-nerdy type of people preferably one year older than you. i have a nice group of friends that stick up for me.
once i had the biggest (and... "plump"est) bullie hating my guts he congregated a whole bunch of people but they knew that my friends were a lot tougher than they were and we scared them off.( only just though because the toughest guy in the group was trying to be funny earlyer and whent to the hostpital with a broken wrist alfter punching one of thos aluminium drain pipes). if you have to fight be quick and dodge as much as you can if they land a good blow on you your a gonner.
sorry if it sounds like i am provoking violence but everybody knows that some people have a short temper and i am being more aof a "just in case" kind of comment
hope this helped

[Hive Carnithrope]

I guess I have never been bullied. I have been teased for being smart with names such as geek, nerd, bof etc. but I take it all in good heart. I'll admit I'm a nerd and proud of it. While I don't play on RPG's or have a spotty face, like people in this category seem to be labled as, I am just smarter then them. Not just with facts but because I won't make stupid mistakes like trying cigarettes or drugs.

Stay cool and smart. Be kind to everyone else, even the teasers. I can't really help for physical bullies. I haven't experienced them and fighting may not always be the answer. If there are three big guys, punching one is not a good idea. Always tell someone or it will get worse.

I hope I helped you guys,

Hive Carnithrope

P.S: On another note, I don't like it when people say that all bullies are scared or have problems at home etc. It's just not true! Some people are just cruel and the only way to stop them is to whack them I think.

Also, we have heard a lot or stories from the people being bullied but I would like to hear about the people who were bullies. I'm sure no one here will judge you. We all make mistakes. I just think it would be interesting to know why you think you did it.

[Hyper Kinetic]

I'd like to requote all of Zephoid's post for truth.
This is, in my opinion, the best way to go about it. Ignoring doesn't work, fighting back only works if you win the first and second fights convincingly. It's all about having friends.

My main concern is that teaming up works both ways in more ways than one.
I was subject to team work from the bullies. Less than pleasant.

There is an additional part too: In somehow getting a victory over bully/ies, you (and anyone who helped) also have to be very careful that you do not yourself become the bully or something approaching it. That takes a lot of self control.

And then you have the issue of the "loner" kid and/or someone who simply does not have any friends (perhaps by being new, maybe by simply being someone that does not fit in with the others or some other reason).

[mina]

I mean obviously I think bullying isn't a good thing,

I also think that it can just start from a misunderstanding. I think some people who would claim to be"bullied" are actually over-reacting to someone else's thoughts/feelings.

I for example a short time back had an aquaintince who ended up telling me she was gay. Now, not to offend anyone but I truly think that is a sin. So it was kind of akward for me to try and figure out how to respond for the first time to this new thing. If she had taken my response the wrong way she could have thought I was bullying her for saying so. (She didn't btw.) But I think there is a line between saying one's thoughts on issues and bullying.

As for the physical/emotional bullies, it seems corny to say but a lot of times they are just socially akward kids who have issues of their own. About 10 years ago I remember a kid picking on me because of my physical disabilities (I walk really weird.) and for being short. It didn't really hit me at the time he was trying to bully me so I just talked to the kid for like an hour and I ended up being friends with him for the summer.

I mean certainly there are the garden variety bullies. (I have never encountered them do to being homeschooled.) but I am all for kicking their asses if they need it. Just don't start the fight, and don't kill them. I'll probably never deal with physical bullying because all the guys around me said they'd kill anyone if they ever found out I was dealing with that.